15 Things Every Parent Should Know
Children Need To Know Love Isn’t Earned
One of the biggest lessons I hope my son, Hadi, carries into adulthood is that love isn't something you earn through achievement. I spent much of my own life measuring my worth by what I accomplished and I know how easy it is to confuse success with self-worth. Of course I want him to have ambition and high standards, but I also want him to know that he's loved simply because he's him. That sense of security will matter far more than any accolade.
Kindness Is More Important Than Talent
The values I'm most intentional about teaching are kindness and respect – especially how you treat people when there's nothing to gain from doing so. I'm also passionate about teaching him the importance of effort. I don't need him to be the best at everything but I do want him to understand that confidence grows from practising, persevering and improving. I also hope family and faith become lifelong anchors and that he grows up curious rather than afraid of making mistakes.
The Smallest Rituals Often Matter Most
Our happiest moments aren't necessarily the biggest ones. They're bedtime conversations, lingering together for a few extra minutes in the morning, family meals and the chats we have in the car between school and whatever comes next. We're quite home-oriented as a family and I've realised – like many do over time – that some of our best memories come from simply being together, without the need for elaborate plans.
Success Looks Different Once You Become A Parent
Before becoming a mother, I measured success through achievement and work. Hadi completely changed that. He made me think much more about what a good life actually feels like, rather than what it looks like from the outside. He also exposed me to the huge gaps in care. Bringing home a baby while feeling physically depleted and underprepared ultimately changed the course of my life and led me to create The Tenth. But the biggest shift was personal – becoming his mother made the stakes far more real in every aspect of my life. It’s made me want to better myself in all areas.
Explanations Are Essential For Children
One habit that's transformed family life is giving Hadi a clear sense of what's happening. He's incredibly observant and I've learnt that things go more smoothly when I explain plans in advance and prepare him for changes, rather than assuming something that feels small to me will feel small to him. Children cope remarkably well when they feel included instead of managed.
Support Doesn't Mean Stepping In
One of the biggest parenting challenges is knowing when to help and when to hold back. My instinct is always to rescue Hadi when I see him struggling but confidence comes from discovering you can do difficult things yourself. I try to stay close, tolerate the wobble and resist taking over too quickly. I want him to know he's capable but equally that asking for help is never a weakness – it’s a fine line.
Children Learn More From Watching Than Listening
There wasn't one defining parenting moment that changed my perspective. Instead, I gradually realised Hadi wasn't just listening to what I said – he was watching how I lived. He notices how I speak to people, how I respond when things go wrong and how I talk about myself. The example we quietly set every day often teaches children more than the lessons we deliberately try to give.
You Don't Have To Win Every Battle
The best parenting advice I ever received was that you don't have to win every moment. Sometimes correcting behaviour matters. Other times protecting the relationship matters more. I've learnt to pause, understand what's underneath the behaviour and come back to the issue once we're both calmer.
No Two Children Need The Same Parenting
A piece of advice I've happily ignored is the idea that there's one right way to raise a child. Children come into the world with completely different personalities, sensitivities and needs. I value expert advice but I've learnt not to confuse confidence with certainty. Good parenting isn't about following someone else's formula – it's about understanding the child in front of you and often, trusting your gut over anything else.
Social Media Doesn't Know Your Child
There's no shortage of parenting advice online but I always question who is speaking and what expertise they actually have. I trust credible experts, the people who know my son personally and, increasingly, my own judgement. No stranger on the internet knows the full context of your family and its individual needs.
You're Never Going To Get Everything Right
Modern parents – particularly women – put enormous pressure on themselves. We grow up believing hard work always leads to the right outcome but parenting doesn't work like that. There's no scorecard or performance review to reassure yourself that you're doing well. I've realised the goal isn't perfection. It's building a relationship with enough love and security to withstand the inevitable imperfect moments.
Being Present Isn't About Being Available Every Second
Running a business means work doesn't magically disappear. For me, being present means knowing the details of Hadi's life. It means understanding what he's excited about, what worries him, listening properly when he talks and making sure he doesn't always experience me as distracted. Perfect balance probably doesn't exist but feeling important to your child does.
One Difficult Evening Doesn't Define You
After a hard parenting day, I've learnt to create space for myself. A shower. A walk. Talking to a friend. Going to bed instead of replaying every mistake I've made. I'm very capable of turning one difficult evening into a full performance review. But children – and parents – both get another chance tomorrow.
Supporting Mothers Is Supporting Children
The greatest investment I made as a parent wasn't a product – it was building a support system. Whether that's childcare, therapy, practical help at home or simply protecting time to feel like myself again, I've learnt that investing in the mother is never separate from investing in the family. We're often willing to spend endlessly on our children but feel guilty spending anything on ourselves. I think we need to change that conversation.
Children Don't Care About Perfect Plans
One of my funniest parenting fails is spending hours creating the ‘perfect’ family day, only to discover Hadi's favourite part was the snack we bought on the way home or a silly conversation in the car. It's a lovely reminder that children are completely uninterested in our production values. They're looking for connection, not perfection and that’s something every parent should remember.
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